Religions
When it comes to religion…
Religious institutions mean well. They really do.
They’ll teach you the story of Jesus. They’ll give you the personal connection — the songs, the pews, the potlucks. And that’s beautiful.
But sometimes I think we get so caught up in the story that we miss asking: WHO really is GOD?
There are many ways that can connect to GOD. Not just one door. Not just one denomination. Not just one way to pray.
The Bible teaches us you have to have faith as small as a mustard seed. That’s it. A seed. Not a forest. Not a seminary degree. Not perfect attendance at the Nazarene church in Concord. Just a seed.
It also says the gate to heaven is narrow. That means we have to think bigger than man’s world. We have to think of the universe. The spiritual realm. The things greater than us.
Man’s laws are different than God’s laws.
Man’s laws say: “Show up on Sunday. Look the part. Don’t ask too many questions.”
God’s laws operate different. They say: “Come as you are. I knew you in the ashes. I’ll meet you in the cocoon.”
And the ability to understand that?
It really comes from looking within — not on the outside, but truly inside.
You can know things about the Bible. You can read it cover to cover. You can go to church every week, take communion, sing in the choir…
and still be absent with the Spirit.
Still not connect on a greater level.
Because to love God is to look within.
That’s where the kingdom exists.
Not in the building. Not in the pastor’s daughter with the Berkeley vocabulary. Not in the obituary that left your name out.
The kingdom is within you.
I learned that in the cell in Douglas County. I learned it when the key to my father’s sold house still fit. I learned it when people called me delusional but God called me daughter.
Religion points to God.
Relationship knows God.
And that relationship? It doesn’t start at the altar.
It starts in your heart. In the quiet. In the ashes. In the “why buy the milk” moments. In the Trileptal and the testimony.
So if you’ve been to church and still feel empty — don’t shame yourself.
Maybe God’s been waiting for you to close your eyes… and look in.
Because that’s where He’s been the whole time. 💛
Phd Student
